December 23rd, 2015

I cried so much I felt my head cracking in two
and I didn't care about the man who almost hit me with his car
or the woman who honked for so long I thought her horn was broken
or the fact that I won't sleep tonight.

I won't shove away any part of existing
just to feel like it's all a perfectly crafted image.
I don't want to be anyone's angel,
anyone's source for hope or security.

I'd rather show you your own ugly demons 
by facing my own
than have you keep staring, pretending
you know even the slightest thing about me.

I'll carve out my days in solitude,
if that's what it takes,
just to quiet the voices of
people who assigned their fantasies
to my twisted soul.

Go find your own peace of mind.
I only know how to find mine.