I don't remember what it feels like.
It hasn't even been that long, but it feels like I never felt it. I used to have a list, now that list is empty. I gave it all away, gave you all away. I don't know what this is, but I know that I don't tolerate the same masks as everyone else. It's a curse, that's for certain. I'd love to play the same games as all of you. I'd love to hide behind fake smiles, a loveless marriage, a job I hate, stagnant, stale days, at a desk. I wish I could take a class on how to be as great at pretending.
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January 2018
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